Living life as a single mom
Vancouver Island News Group - Cowichan News Leader
January 16, 2008

For her, life is about the journey more than the destination.

With that mantra in mind, 25-year-old Becky Murphy has no regrets about taking the long road and walking it.

Still, the single mother of two boys -- aged four and one-and-a-half -- concedes doing so hasn't been effortless.

She has struggled financially. Some made snide remarks about her parenting abilities. She just recently had the opportunity to begin completing her high school education.

"It's not easy," Murphy said. "It's not something I really understood until I had children of my own.

"But there's a lot of resources. We've got a good support group."

Support groups available in the Cowichan Valley have made it easier for Murphy to network with parents facing similar problems….

"The goal may be the same but there's different ways of getting there," she said. "There isn't only one way to get what you want.

"You've got to find what works for you."

After being kicked out of Cowichan secondary school during her final year, Murphy journeyed to Victoria, where she met a man who would eventually become the father of her children.

A breakdown in communication tore them apart, although the father has an active role in his sons' lives.

"(The pregnancy) happened a lot sooner than we planned," she said. "Slowly, over time, things kind of crumbled and fell apart."

Now completing her high school education at the Adult Learning Centre in Duncan, Murphy sends her children to daycare workdays to allow her to study at the library or attend classes.

Her return to school followed several failed attempts at doing so.

"This time, I'm determined to finish," she said. "I was going to go to work but it's really hard to find childcare."

Since having her first child, Dominique, four years ago, Murphy has sacrificed a lot….

While her children receive support from their parents and employees at the Growing Together childcare centre, their mother found it elsewhere…..

"There's nothing that says you can't be a single mother and successful."